Media Monday- Media and my Marriage

I remember years ago when my husband and I first got together. We barely had a cell phone between the two of us and no internet. The only media that got in our way was the TV in our living room and bedroom. And even then the TV in the living room wasn't hurting our marriage, at least I didn't think so. We did realize, though, that having media in our bedroom was not a good thing and we removed our TV. We got asked all the time how we could live without a TV in our room and to this day I tell people to just ask my husband how things have been since removing the TV from our bedroom. ;-)

Fast forward 8 years and 3 kids and a more stable financial life and you'll see much more media in our life. Between the internet, Netflix, 2 cell phones and 2 game systems (which I still feel is a type of media) we are on technology overload some days. What I do pride myself in is the fact that we don't have a smartphone, iPad, iPhone or even a laptop.

If you ask my husband he'll probably tell you that there are some days that he thinks I'm on the computer way too much and I'm sure it puts a strain on our marriage those days. So to help combat that I'm very proactive when he's home. I ask him if he minds if I go on the computer for a little bit to check my email. Then once I hear, "how much email do you have left?", I know I've been on too long and it's time to make my time about my husband not the computer screen.

I have to say though, the media hasn't been all bad to our relationship. It has helped in a lot of ways. It's helped me be a better wife by finding sites such as Women Living Well and Time-warp Wife. It's also helped me be a better mom by finding other blogs I enjoy reading and getting tips and encouragement from. Some of the best blogs I've found are on how to save money. The way I combat trying to read all the blogs is I have them sent to my email and when I have lots of great articles I want to read I save them in my email for days that my husband is at work and I have some free time in between taking care of 3 children. Another way technology has helped our marriage is it allows me to talk to my husband during times that I probably wouldn't be able to talk to him otherwise. My husband works in EMS so there is no "office" phone for me to call if I need him for something or if the kids would like to talk to him. So without our cell phones there would be days on end that we wouldn't talk him. The computer also allows me to talk to him through Facebook when he's able to get on the computer at work. Since my husband can work sometimes 48 hours in a row, the technology has been an invaluable asset to our marriage of allowing us to stay in contact even if its a quick I love you through text.

I will admit though some days its a real pain to hear the "ding" of our phones going off. Especially, my husbands phone because he gets contacted by his work through his phone. We do try really hard to make family time, family time and not even look at our phones. And if we do look at our phones its a quick look and it gets put away, but its hard some days. The one place I'm trying to get our cell phones away from is the dinner table. I don't want our kids to think our cell phones or what's on it is more important than talking to them. So there is a downfall to the technology and I think we try to work on it all the time but sometimes there are those days I would love to take my husband's cell phone and throw it out the window. But only having some days like that is better than every day. :-) Those reasons is largely in part why we do not have smartphones, iPads, or iPhones.

So all in all, I think we have our technology under control and right now its not hurting our marriage. It is a constant effort every single day for me to remember that I am human and I have human interactions that I need to worry about not keyboard interactions through a screen. Some days are easier than others, especially if its a hot day for great deals! :-) Do you think media helps or hurts your marriage?